Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Randomize
