dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
