i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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