went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
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