Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize