Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
You can't motorboat a personality
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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