Sponge bath it is.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Randomize
