he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
