At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
