In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
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