The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
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