Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
As shirtless as possible
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Randomize
