I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
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