Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
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