We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
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