Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Randomize
