I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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