I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
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