Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Randomize
