It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
