She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
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