His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Randomize
