im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
