I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
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He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
i think i just lost a toe
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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