yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize