Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
my being single is dangerous.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
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