trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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