I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Randomize
