tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
just tell him i said nine months
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
