Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Randomize
