i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize