I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Randomize
