I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
