I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Randomize
