I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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