dude i'm inner monologue high
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I think I just shit out all my problems.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
Randomize
