No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
don't judge my taste in strippers
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
