Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize
