I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Damn victory sex feels great
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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