why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
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