i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
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