Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Randomize
