worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
