In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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