bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
He kissed a someone with a penis
you mean i was at the winter classic?
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
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