So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
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