if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
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