do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
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