Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
