Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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